Post – April 3, 2009 16:35:33

This is a great post and I’ve pretty much uttered everything on that list at least once.

Here’s the list with interpertations

20. That’s weird….

What the hell did you do?

19. It’s never done that before.

There’s a first time for everything, try it again and leave me alone

18. It worked yesterday.

Have you tried restarting WebShpincter…

17. How is that possible?

Proceed to bash head against wall

16. It must be a hardware problem.

God damn diode dick electrical engiqueers

15. What did you type in wrong to get it to crash?

Are you sure you have opposable thumbs?

14. There is something funky in your data. OR It’s a data problem, not a program problem.

Garbage in, garbage out, WTF are you stupid or something

13. I haven’t touched that module in weeks!

Software rots you fool

12. You must have the wrong version.

You’re obviously a moron

11. It’s just some unlucky coincidence.

Everyonce in a while a neutrino zaps a bit, you’ll get over it, computers aren’t deterministic

10. I can’t test everything!

and even if I could you’re not paying me enough

9. THIS can’t be the source of THAT.

You’re living in a fantasy.

8. It works, but it hasn’t been tested.

Good luck with all that…

7. Somebody must have changed my code.

And I know who the asshole is…

6. Did you check for a virus on your system?

Have you tried rebooting, idiot.

5. Even though it doesn’t work, how does it feel?

I’m in denial, but seriously do you like the way it looks

4. You can’t use that version on your system.

What a noob

3. Why do you want to do it that way?

Don’t you have something better to do, like annoying someone else.

2. Where were you when the program blew up?

Its your problem, deal with it.

And the Number One Thing Programmers Say When Their Programs Don’t Work:

1. It works on my machine.

What are you, fucking stupid

This is a great idea, Conficker Eye Chart

Thoughts on WebSphere

I’ve been tasked with making a case against WebSphere (or Websphincter as I like to call it) which I have no problems with. The issue I’m having, there seems to be a lack of WebSphere criticism that can be used with senior management types (hopefully it’s a matter of not finding it yet.)

If you have any erudite comments on the (un)fitness of WebSphere in the Enterprise please leave a comment.

rTunes update for iTunes 8.1.x

rTunes for iTunes 8.1.x (I’ve tested it with for Windows only at this time.

My Mac Mini is being shipped so hopefully I’ll have a mac update sooner than later.

You can get the latest release here:

rTunes update for iTunes 8.0.x

I’ve finally have a release of rTunes for iTunes 8.0.x (I’ve tested it with and Windows only at this time. I’m trying to update an old Mac G4 to do the Mac port. You can get the latest release here:

rTunes update for iTunes 8

I have an update of rTunes ready that will work with iTunes 8, unfortunately a tree fell out behind the house and took out my neighbourhood’s telephone service (remarkably cable was unscathed.) So once Bell gets off their duff I’ll post the update.

Installing VMWare Server 2 on Fedora Core 9

Well, I gave core 9 another chance, and it seems to work a little better than the first time I installed it, the secret seems to be disabling the NetworkManager.

The big issue I’ve found when installing VMWare server on Fedora is that after there is a kernel update it is no longer straight forward to install VMWare since it is unlikely the default config will work with the new kernel. This means installing kernel sources, which of course are no longer installed with fedora any more.

So on a good day all you need is the version of the kernel you are currently using and then issue the command: yum install kernel-devel, with the current version of Core 9 (updated Oct. 31, 2008) the include path you would use is: /lib/modules/

See: for more detailed information.

As always you mileage may vary.

Websphincter the gift that keeps on giving!

Honestly, could IBM make a product any more complicated? To download websphincter for linux and windows requires 9GB of disk space, thats Gigabyte with a capital G. Core blind me, I’m 17% through the down load and just 139 hours left to go. I’m not joking, I wish I were, and IBM chooses such clever and meaningful names for the downloads like, WTF, I’m sorry I left my rosetta stone up your asshole. Needless to say, I’m sure more fun will ensue.

Fedora Core 9, Dead on arival

I like Fedora/Red Hat it’s the only linux distro I’ve used in the last 5 years, but Core 9 is DOA. Any OS that doesn’t properly start its networking (and I’m not the only one to experience this) doesn’t make the grade. I’ve now down graded to Core 8 which seems much more stable (is Fedora turning into the Star Trek franchise?) Core 9 looks nice, but I’m going to wait for 10 after this experience, namely “no networking”, start the network via /etc/init.d/network and then login, guess what the UI doesn’t recognize the active network, and I say piss of.

Your first clue that Microsoft’s TCO is more expensive than Linux

This poor guy is complaining about how hosting sites that offer Microsoft based hosting are more expensive than LAMP, no really, and herein lies that real proof that MS claims about Windows TCO being lower than Linux are exposted for the marketing lies that  they are.

The killing rates of ” Windows Web Hosting ” and additional charges for ” SQL Server ” with many unexplained cache in calculations, were the main reasons to add frustration in proceeding further with the Microsoft Career.